Suffer Now or Suffer Later

Well, I freaked out at first and probably pissed off the doctor, but then things got better.

I was still kind of disappointed though.

As I wrote yesterday, today was my annual health check and I started it by making a big mistake: I looked up the possible side effects of an upper endoscopy on the internet. I therefore went into the health check worrying that I’d made a terrible mistake and was going to have bleeding and a sore throat and would passout on the way home after traveling in the wrong direction. (Something like that.)

I was surprised to see how modern the clinic was and how calm every one seemed compared to last year’s “MOVE, MAGGOT, MOVE!” attitude. The comedy, though, started when I changed into my hospital clothes. Everything  was too short. I had highwater trousers and a hapi style jacket that looked like a short sleeve version and only reached my waist. The best thing was they had airplane style slippers that actually fit my feet (I almost brought them home but they started to tear).

Every thing went surprisingly well after that. (It’s the difference between a private clinic and a public hospital). After the basic checks, though, I went for the endoscopy.

This had several steps. First I had to drink something and the nurse left me alone for a few minutes whilst whatever it was started to take effect. Then she injected some kind of anesthetic gel onto the back of my throat and I had to lean back and hold it there for a few minutes. That was hard and I sat up a few times to keep from choking. (Probably a mistake.)

When the doctor came in the nurse sprayed the back of my throat with something and the doctor started the procedure. I noticed that the nurse was behind me and wondered if she was there to hold my head. The doctor inserted the camera and, after a bit, I panicked, started to choke and pulled the tube out.

Two things happened at that point: First, I was shocked at how much tube came out. Second, the doctor started lecturing me about how many of these he’d done and that he’d trained in Germany and I how I needed to stop wasting his time (the latter was implied). I relaxed and they tried again and it all went well. But it was weird feeling the camera moving around.

All must have gone well because I was then sent to the final consultation with a different doctor. She pulled on my lower eye lids. Pressed under my ears and checked my thyroid then threw me out. The entire consultation lasted less than a minute.

I then went home and took a nice nap until I was able to eat and drink again.

This is much better than drinking barium and getting the amusement park ride x-ray treatment. That isn’t so painful at first, but you can’t go home and take a nap because you get to enjoy four hours of Constant Intermittent Explosive D (a technical term).

This does lead to a philosophical issue of whether it’s better to suffer now for a good time later or experience a good time now and suffer later.

I’d prefer to suffer now and will request the endoscopy in the future.

That said, I’m disappointed I didn’t get to watch the video of my stomach. I could kind of see it out of the corner of my eye, but I  hope they send me a copy. I know it’s odd, but I’m interested in looking at me from inside as well.

Maybe next year.

1 thought on “Suffer Now or Suffer Later

  1. Pingback: The Best Laid Plans Waylaid by the Way Side | Mere Blather

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