I’ve started a new contract, sort of, with the company I work for, but I’m not happy about it. At least I won’t be until I start actually working. The more I sort of have to work, the more angry I feel.

The new(ish) rules governing these “work” days operate on a kind of double-dipping. I am on call all day, and am even required to have my phone with me in case I’m called in, but if I’m not called in I’m expected to produce some kind of evidence that I’ve worked even though I’ve not been asked to work. (And the company won’t subsidize the phone even though I’m required to have it.)

As such, I’m still stuck at home doing stuff and hoping I’m not called in on days I’m watching our youngest. (Note: since no schools are in session, it’s unlikely I’ll be called in but the possibility is still annoying.) This makes me angry as it leaves me unable to relax because I have to do busy work. Quite frankly, if they gave me a specific assignment it wouldn’t annoy me as much as the “just do it on your own” attitude.

Complicating matters is the fact I haven’t actually signed my contract yet. I’m not, technically, holding out. I simply asked a question that hasn’t been answered yet. In fact, the email asking the question hasn’t even been acknowledged.

That adds to the anger and doesn’t exactly motivate me to do my best work for the company.

For a while I tried, but after a while it’s like sending Christmas cards to people who never send one back. Eventually you give up trying.